Monday, November 9, 2009

Lost and broken

I am a ball of cheer, I know. But.......I just can't get past this. My life is so messed up right now. I want to get a 2nd opinion, but I don't want to have to drive 6 hours round trip to do so, but I don't want to stick with a subpar RE just because either.

Today was my first day back at work. It was really hard to go back. I am super emotional right now, so I was crying to A as I was getting ready this morning and then when I got there I almost cried in front my boss just because I was so upset to be there and wanted to go home.

The first two hours were difficult too, my boss wanted me to file all the stuff they had left sitting around for the last two weeks and it's hard for me to stand for a long time still. So by the end I was slumping over the top of the filing cabinet, putting things away. But by the end of the day it was hard to sit at my desk too. I couldn't wait to go home. My 2nd boss came in and didn't even acknowledge me. Yes, I don't like them, but after missing 12 days straight you would think they would show a little compassion and ask how I was doing. Sigh, I guess I still expect too much out of them.

I am heading to bed early tonight I think. I am really sore and I have a bad headache. Plus, I just want the oblivion that sleep brings. That's all for know, I feel like I am having trouble articulating what I want to say.........................

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