Thursday, September 29, 2011

Weaning

This is definitely a subject that needs it's own post.
Weaning.
Is.
Hard.
I totally went about it the wrong way, I am sure, and made it worse on myself than it could have been, but, holy cow did it hurt. Like nothing I have ever felt before. And I have felt pain. I experienced every part of labor, except the pushing, I have had multiple surgeries (including my c-section), I have been hospitalized with OHSS...I have felt pain.
But this was something else.
I am (was) an overproducer (well, at least this time around, we will see how next time goes), so even dropping sessions was pretty painful, so I should have realized how difficult this was going to be. I had worked myself down to 4x/day. 6, 12, 6, 12. I was still pretty full and starting to get sore around the times I needed to pump. But I was doing ok, and still keeping up with C.
One day, I decided to push it a little bit further. I got engorged, but I was okay once I pumped. Did it a few more times this way, kept getting more sore and not emptying fully. I figured that since I wanted to wean before our trip to MI, I might as well cut back on the amount of time I pumped, to try and get the weaning process started.
So, yes. I cut back on the number of sessions a day, at the same time as cutting back the amount of time I pumped. Not really the way you are supposed to go about weaning. You are supposed to do one or the other. Nope, not me. Smart like I am, I decided to do both.
And, then! I got so sore and engorged, I thought....Screw this, I am just going to stop. If it hurts already, why not just stop and get it all over with.
O.M.G.
Not a good idea.
I had bricks on my chest. Absolute bricks. That hurt SO BADLY, it was almost comical. I actually cried multiple times during this process. And I went through breast pads like there were nobody's business. I couldn't beleive the amount I leaked. I couldn't hold C, it hurt to go from a laying position to a sitting up position, it hurt to roll from one side to another, it hurt to shower, it hurt to just be.
I tried everything to ease it. Narcotics from my c-section, but they made me jittery at night and I couldn't sleep (although the did help with the pain), Ty.lenol and Ibu.profen every 4/6 hours, cabbage leaves, tight bras, loose bras, pumping once or twice more (I didn't want to stimulate too much), hand expressing a few times, Ben.adryl, Su.dafed, sage mixed into vegetable juice. Pretty much any idea listed online, I tried at least once.
I can't say what "fixed it", because I don't really know if anything helped other than time, but it took me a good 1.5 weeks to start feeling a bit better, and 3 weeks to stop having pain when holding C and for my breasts to start softening up.
Good things.....I don't really leak anymore, I got to return my pump (loved it for what it did for me and C, hated it for how restricted it made me feel), no more breast pads.
Bad thing.....I think my breasts are smaller now than they were to begin with. And I was a member of the itty bitty titty committee to start. :( And the skin is really loose.

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